i dont wanna grow up

I just wanted to say this summer is not going as I had plain but at the same time it is. I got a new phone but no job. I’m saving my money not really going out like that. But I don’t have the boyfriend that I thought I would be able to talk with on the phone. My best friend and I hung out, but just that one time. I thought I was going to always be over there. Well I lied to my self.

But this summer may turn out to be a success after all. My dad is moving in to my grandma’s house because she is moving to Florida (that’s what old people do when they retire) and he is moving there. And ever since I visited I always like the basement. It’s like from one of those old 70’s movies when they had like this dimly lit bar with wooden walls and mirrors everywhere. So I’m pressed because there is a bar and these red steps that I was infatuated by. So when I heard he was moving I offered to help clean out things in the basement because it had become a storage area. And then I said “I just wanted everyone to know I’m staping the fact that the basement will be my room” and I didn’t say it because I will have my own door, bathroom, and washer and dryer. I said it because I have always had to share a room with my lil sister. And I’m sorry but she is foul and I can not live in the same room as her. She needs help and I won’t be the one.

So let’s hope I get these jobs I been applying for…. I had an interview at the Nationals Park for this restaurant named Levy. And I had a call back for this pet care thing but they have not called to schedule an appointment. So keep your fingers crossed. Either way I have saved up enough to buy a car. Now I just have to save up the money to take care of a used car.

Being grown up is soooo not easy

thoughts

Words have a power to them that you don’t realize until you have already spoken or sent them.

I just re-watched the 2012 movie and it just reminded me that we need to get our lives together, because something big is coming. I don’t know what it’s going to be but its going to be something.

I have an interview tomorrow so wish me luck.

Not a good day for him..

Today was a great productive day for me. Unfortunately for a man that I encountered on the street it was not so great a day for him. When I first saw him I was with my mom on our way to get my new phone. Hang out at the club and around drunken people have enabled me to spot the slightest bit of intoxication. So I knew he was tipsy or hammered. So when my mom told me the cops had stop pass and left him lying on the floor. I had a feeling his day was not going to end to great. I thought they would come back and see him in the same spot and arrest him for being drunk in public. Well this was not the case. While we were in the phone store he must have swung at one of the guys that are always standing on the block. You know your regular dc thug. Well that was his biggest mistake of the day. Far bigger then getting drunk, far bigger then choosing this street to sit on. The guys proceed to beat and kick him till his left I was bleeding and his face looked as though it was a piece of raw meat. My mom being the caring mother rushed to his aid when we saw the blood on the sidewalk and stayed with him till the ambulance arrived. No one came to this mans aid no one stop this man from beating on him. No one and it sad that the black community has to deal with low life thugs like this that take advantage of their strength. Instead of simply calling the cops and explain that this man is drunk and taking swings at me. The man choose to beat him till be bleed, and for what? Like what did he really get out of that? Now the cops are looking for you because you almost killed this man. It’s sad. Really sad.

I'm on a boat b*tch

I have been in the house since my demise on Thursday. So you would be glad to hear that today at 11 o’clock I jumped into a fresh white charger and went on a day date to a boat on the anacostia water front. Where I watched a movie and ate quiznos.

The guy clearly wants to be more then a friend. He keep saying little cutie things like what we could be doing the rest of the summer is coming out to his boat and sail to Georgetown. But with me not really feeling like getting into anything right now and him going back to school this summer in North Carolina for summer school and training camp I don’t think it’s a good idea for me to even try to get to know him.

But it was cutie that he tried. He even introduced me to one of his friends as his girlfriend. I didn’t bother to correct him because at the moment I felt like I would never see these group of people again and I didn’t want to hurt his swage. He’s a nice guy. A little shorter then I would go for. But he has facial hair short hair cut and a nice build because he plays football. He has ambition something that you can’t teach or force down someone through. We are on the same level right now. We are both in our junior summer and 20 years old. I’m older by a month and two days. So maybe one day we will meet again and the time might be right for us to venture into more of each other. But for this summer he’s not the one I’m going to be daydreaming about and spending nights with. Ill tell you when I find him.

oh snap

It’s not hard to find a job. It is however hard to keep one. I got fired on my first day on the job. Since then I have found about 20 new jobs to apply for. Hopefully I will be able to get a car. And I’m going to get a blackberry, so this summer is not lost after all.

Love’s a timed thing
Summer happens once a year
And we only have one life to live
It seems all these facts have
Come to my attention at once
So I guess ill get my passport set
And fly out on the next thing soaring
So what will you do for the summer 2010

post

I lost my job on the first day... I need money for school and i really don't want to turn 21 with out having a car. So sorry i don't feel like writing this post. Maybe tomorrow will be better.

Mid Day Post

I had one of those mid day naps because I got up real early to go out with one of my old friends for some eats. I swear I thought three dollars was going to get me three regular size pancakes. Well they tricked me. I got these jinormous pancakes and I couldn’t even finish one. That’s why Americans are so fat right now.

Anyway my dream was about me and my father… So I was like grown with dreads to kill. And I got a call from this producer guy saying my father was ready to meet me. And in my dream I was like about time. And when I got there it was like a regular day at his house. His kids were running around in pampers, his wife was making dinner and he was in the studio. So I sat there and waited for him to come out. In the dream he didn’t have to explain anything to me. It was like we were best friends already. And I was just waiting for him to ask me into his life. So towards the end I had a male friend come and visit and I wanted him to meet my newly found father. But for some reason he was running away from me and the guy. So finally I sat the male down and went searching for my father. When I saw him he was running out the back door. And I was like hell no get your sorry excuse for a dad ass back in here and face me. I would probably never really say that but in my dream it came out. He came back in and told me he just couldn’t be the dad I wanted, and that I was better off with out him. You see I found this strange because not once did we argue about money, him not paying child support, college, getting me a car, nothing. But what I wanted from him was to be my dad.

At breakfast this came up in our convo. Like I have a step dad who has been there for me I think from like the age 8. And he knows my SSN, my birth date, the grades I get, he’s been at all my graduations, he know of all my ex heart breaks, he’s picked me up from school, I’m on his taxes, and he loves me. So he is in a sense everything I want in a dad. But I still wanted to give my father a chance at being there. Unfortunately I think this dream was telling me he can’t be that for me.

While checking my email I came across a bit of information on a family in England. A black family, “Peter and Paula Imafidon, 9-year-old twins from Waltham Forest in northeast London, are a part of the highest-achieving clan in the history of Great Britain education.” It’s about a family from Nigeria in West Africa who came over 30 years ago. They have produced some amazing children. With Anne-Marie now 20 who holds the world record as the youngest girl to pass the A-level computing, when she was just 13. She is now studying Johns Hopkins University, in Baltimore. Then Christina, 17, is the youngest student to ever get accepted and study at an undergraduate institution at any British university at 11. Another one is Samantha, now age 12, had passed two rigorous high school-level mathematics and statistics exams at the age of 6. The cap stone being Peter and Paula, they aren’t saying that there genes are to thank but the great education for the underprivileged.

I found this interesting because my friend and I also talked about this at breakfast; because yesterday May 17th was the anniversary of the Brown vs. Bored of Education. He believed that schools would have been better in a sense if they were still segregated; because the African American children would learn more about their African roots, while the causations would learn from the curriculum that we are learning now. I had to disagree; I believe predominantly black schools are some what of a crutches. They are not a sample of the real world. Because in the real world nothing is color coded everyone is in the same bucket trying to reach to the top. I also believe we are still segregated but not by color. Instead we are segregated my income. If your family makes a certain amount you can afford to live in certain areas and these areas may be predominantly black or white, causing schools to be segregated by money instead of color.

What do you feel about this?